Help With Wurdz

[caps]

I think you misunderstood me? In one power I had "before the game starts" and in the other I had "At the beginning of the game." They mean the same thing and the latter sounds more in line with other cards, so I made them match it. I didn't see you comment on that part of the text at all.

 

[Dad_Scaper]

Ah. I did misunderstand you. I thought you were trying to keep some weird sentence structure parallel inside the power.

Regardless, the point of writing is to be in service to the reader. Make it as helpful as possible to your readers, with all other considerations being lesser priorities.

 

[Sir Yeshua]

Anyone around who can help me with this? I’m mostly trying to figure out a cleaner way to say ‘once this ability succeeds, he’s done using it for the turn’ to prevent weird stuff from happening

PROTECTIVE REPOSITIONING 13
Whenever a Medium friendly figure adjacent to ~ is targeted by a normal ranged attack from an opponents figure, you may roll the 20-sided die. If you roll 13 or higher, switch ~ with the targeted figure and the attacking figure must target ~. Once ~ has been moved by this power, you may not roll for it for the rest of the turn.

 

[Tornado]

Do you want it restricted to the card or player turn?
I think you can just say: This power may only be used once per turn.
You just may need to designate which as I do not remember what the default is in classic.

 

[Vydar_XLIII]

Anyone around who can help me with this? I’m mostly trying to figure out a cleaner way to say ‘once this ability succeeds, he’s done using it for the turn’ to prevent weird stuff from happening

PROTECTIVE REPOSITIONING 13
Whenever a Medium friendly figure adjacent to ~ is targeted by a normal ranged attack from an opponents figure, you may roll the 20-sided die. If you roll 13 or higher, switch ~ with the targeted figure and the attacking figure must target ~. Once ~ has been moved by this power, you may not roll for it for the rest of the turn.

Let me try my hand at it.

First, Protective Repositioning is a power name that already exists in VC on the Honor Guard of the Blasted Lands. So if that matters to you, you'll need to change the power name. Second, only medium? Not the typical "small and medium"? Third, a "normal ranged attack" isn't a thing.

I cribbed a lot of the wording from the Warforged Soldiers' Tactical Switch.

PROTECTIVE REPOSITIONING 13
When an opponent's unengaged figure attacks a friendly medium figure adjacent to [NAME], before rolling attack dice, you may switch [NAME] with the defending figure. After switching spaces, the opponent's figure must attack [NAME], if possible, and cannot attack any other figure this turn. Figures moved by Protective Repositioning 13 never take any leaving engagement attacks. [NAME] may only be moved by Tactical Switch once per turn.

 

[Sir Yeshua]

Let me try my hand at it.

First, Protective Repositioning is a power name that already exists in VC on the Honor Guard of the Blasted Lands. So if that matters to you, you'll need to change the power name. Second, only medium? Not the typical "small and medium"? Third, a "normal ranged attack" isn't a thing.

I cribbed a lot of the wording from the Warforged Soldiers' Tactical Switch.

PROTECTIVE REPOSITIONING 13
When an opponent's unengaged figure attacks a friendly medium figure adjacent to [NAME], before rolling attack dice, you may switch [NAME] with the defending figure. After switching spaces, the opponent's figure must attack [NAME], if possible, and cannot attack any other figure this turn. Figures moved by Protective Repositioning 13 never take any leaving engagement attacks. [NAME] may only be moved by Tactical Switch once per turn.

Huh. I’ve been gone too long. I’ll think of a different power name, totally blanked on small figures existing and forgot that ‘ranged attack’ wasn’t a thing lol I’m rusty

I like your version, although I think I’ll change the triggering text to “targeted by a normal attack from a non-adjacent opponent” that’s found on the Nakitas.

Thanks for your help!

 

[Dad_Scaper]

Sir Yeshua, I'm happy to take a look also, but it looks like the excellent help you've already received here is leading to a redesign of the power.

Thanks for sharing, and thanks @Tornado and @Vydar_XLIII for answering the question!

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

Long time, no see! Hope all is well with you and yours.

This is a cleaner swashbuckling move than Irish Saber Dance. I'm hoping you can refine the wording, maybe combine the two powers?

Quick Slash Special Attack
Range 1, Attack 3
Gráinne may attack with Quick Slash Special Attack at any point before, during or after her normal movement. Opponents' figures subtract 1 from their defense dice for each skull rolled with Quick Slash Special Attack.

Slash and Shoot
After Gráinne attacks with Quick Slash Special Attack and completes her normal movement, she may then attack with her normal attack.


Thanks.

 

[Vydar_XLIII]

Ok, lets see what we can do here.

Firstly, the power "Slash and Shoot" has already been used by Deltacron.

SLASH AND SHOOT SPECIAL ATTACK
Range Special. Attack Special.
Choose any figure that is engaged with Deltacron to attack and roll 5 attack dice. If Deltacron is not engaged after that attack, you may choose a figure within 4 spaces of Deltacron to attack and roll 3 attack dice.

So you can't use that name. Further, I don't think it matters since I think you're better off rolling both effects into one power.

Secondly, I'd borrow all the power wording from Kumiko's "Ninjutsu Barrage Special Attack" and change the numbers, change the "instead of" clause at the beginning, and add the defense reduction sentence at the end.

NINJUTSU BARRAGE SPECIAL ATTACK
Range 1. Attack 3.
Instead of moving and attacking normally with Kumiko, you may move Kumiko up to 3 spaces. Kumiko can attack up to 3 times with Ninjutsu Barrage Special Attack at any point before, during, or after this move as long as Kumiko is on a space where she could end her movement. Kumiko cannot attack the same figure more than once on a single turn.

To get mostly the same effect as the two powers you have now, you can phrase it like this. (The only difference is that the movement is stuck at 5 spaces instead of a normal move which could have road bonus or something.)

QUICK SLASH SPECIAL ATTACK
Range 1. Attack 3.
Instead of moving normally and before attacking normally with Gráinne O'Hara, you may move Gráinne up to 5 spaces. Gráinne can attack with Quick Slash Special Attack at any point before, during, or after this move as long as Gráinne is on a space where she could end her movement. Opponents' figures roll one less defense die for each skull rolled with Quick Slash Special Attack.

Hope that helps.

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

Ok, lets see what we can do here.

Firstly, the power "Slash and Shoot" has already been used by Deltacron.

SLASH AND SHOOT SPECIAL ATTACK
Range Special. Attack Special.
Choose any figure that is engaged with Deltacron to attack and roll 5 attack dice. If Deltacron is not engaged after that attack, you may choose a figure within 4 spaces of Deltacron to attack and roll 3 attack dice.

So you can't use that name. Further, I don't think it matters since I think you're better off rolling both effects into one power.

Secondly, I'd borrow all the power wording from Kumiko's "Ninjutsu Barrage Special Attack" and change the numbers, change the "instead of" clause at the beginning, and add the defense reduction sentence at the end.

NINJUTSU BARRAGE SPECIAL ATTACK
Range 1. Attack 3.
Instead of moving and attacking normally with Kumiko, you may move Kumiko up to 3 spaces. Kumiko can attack up to 3 times with Ninjutsu Barrage Special Attack at any point before, during, or after this move as long as Kumiko is on a space where she could end her movement. Kumiko cannot attack the same figure more than once on a single turn.

To get mostly the same effect as the two powers you have now, you can phrase it like this. (The only difference is that the movement is stuck at 5 spaces instead of a normal move which could have road bonus or something.)

QUICK SLASH SPECIAL ATTACK
Range 1. Attack 3.
Instead of moving normally and before attacking normally with Gráinne O'Hara, you may move Gráinne up to 5 spaces. Gráinne can attack with Quick Slash Special Attack at any point before, during, or after this move as long as Gráinne is on a space where she could end her movement. Opponents' figures roll one less defense die for each skull rolled with Quick Slash Special Attack.

Hope that helps.

Thanks for taking the time to comment. Since I'm raising her Move to 6, I guess it's OK to raise it in the power. Again, thanks so much for this. I feel much more confident . . .

 

[Vydar_XLIII]

Thanks for taking the time to comment. Since I'm raising her Move to 6, I guess it's OK to raise it in the power. Again, thanks so much for this. I feel much more confident . . .

No problem!

Yes, if you're increasing her normal move speed to 6, it makes sense that it would be mirrored in the Special Attack.

 

[Dad_Scaper]

I like it! Thanks for sharing.

You may find that a base attack of 2 balances her a bit. A base attack of 3 with Range 7, when she can keep a pod of pirates around her, is a big cannon. You'll get more play with her melee powers if her ranged attack isn't so big.

I think Vydar_xlii 's suggestion is good.

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

Dad, thanks for commenting. This scenario is such that Buccaneers will be eschewed. You are probably right, given your superior level of expertise. I’ll keep your advice in mind during the testing process.

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

Gráinne O'Hara was originally conceived as a pistolero. Her figure is Lirianne, half-elf gunslinger, from Pathfinder's Iconic Heroes set #4. Early on, she was an Outlaw and Reckless, supporting the Tombstone Gunslingers and Bonding with Rogue squads (Buccaneers). She is armed with Alkanstar Pistols, "heavy war flintlocks," so I was comfortable with Range 7 and Attack 3. The Outlaw heroes Garrett Burns and Cal the Smuggler have Range 7 and Attack 3, and, to my mind, Attack 2 is a bit punky for a non-filler hero.

I tested her with the Gunslingers and Buccaneers, and found them to be weak and OM nightmares (and wrigzz hated them). Then I decided on Captain and Disciplined to reflect her general leadership abilities. She originally had Double Attack as her special power. I replaced her Bonding with Combat Leader to make her more generally useful, and a complicated melee power that required Disengage and jettisoning Double Attack.

Her current special power is of recent vintage and reflects the type of fighting you'd expect from membership in a boarding party. Life 4 and Defense 3 makes her a bit of a glass cannon, and mitigates the cost of her offensive power. Her being a bit frail, and her Captainship, requires her to exercise restraint and stay out of harm's way as much as possible.

Rather than reducing her Attack, I've reduced her Range to 4 for the time being.

Anyways, if she plays the way I think she will, she will be a fun, flavorful, and unique unit, well worth consideration for induction into the SoV.

P.S.: While her current sculpt is readily available, I presented a couple of Reaper (Dark Heaven) unpainted alternative sculpts that really reflect her special power.

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

Changed name of special power to reflect the sculpts' 2 pistols.

P.S.: The alternate sculpts in the previous post are no longer appropriate, of course.

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

Need help with this, please.

First Mate
At the beginning of the game, designate a small or medium Unique Hero you control to be your First Mate. If Order Marker 1 is placed on Nikerym O'Hara, then before taking that turn with Nikerym O'Hara, you may take a turn with your First Mate. You may not take any additional turns with other figures.

The last sentence is what may need revising. A side question: If Sir Gilbert is chosen as First Mate, can he still execute Jandar’s Dispatch?

Thanks!

 

[Vydar_XLIII]

Lets start with Ornak's Red Flag of Fury Aura and the Greenscale Warriors Loyalty to the Lizard King.

LOYALTY TO THE LIZARD KING
At the start of the game, choose a Unique Lizardfolk Hero you control or a Unique large or huge Dragon Hero you control to be the Greenscale Warrior’s Lizard King. A Greenscale Warrior rolls 1 additional attack and defense die when its chosen Lizard King is within 2 clear sight spaces. You can choose only one Lizard King for all the Greenscale Warriors you control you control.

RED FLAG OF FURY AURA
If Order Marker 1 is on Ornak, then instead of taking that turn with Ornak, you may take a turn with up to 2 Unique Heroes you control who follow Utgar. Ornak cannot be one of the 2 Unique Heroes. Any Unique Hero that is taking a turn instead of Ornak must be within 8 clear sight spaces of Ornak prior to its movement.

Taking the relevant parts of these powers and changing Ornak's power to match the syntax of more recent bonding powers, we get to something like this.

FIRST MATE
At the start of the game, choose a small or medium Unique Hero you control to be Nikerym O'Hara's First Mate. After revealing Order Marker 1 on this Army Card, before taking Nikerym's turn, you may take a turn with Nikerym's First Mate. ...

I think that is the best way to word that portion of the power, even though it doesn't fully follow from Ornak's precedent.

The last sentence is difficult. We certainly don't have precedent for this line. I think I'd go with something like...

Any Special Power on the First Mate's Army card that would take a turn with a different Army Card cannot be used this turn.

This would allow powers like Sir Gilbert's Jandar's Dispatch and Crimson Widow's Midnight Raid to be used and powers like Kato Katsuro's Command and Iskra Esenwein's Summon the Rechets of Bogdan to be unusable. Most other multi-turn powers like those on Clayton, Kurrok, Talingul and Xundar already have a "After revealing an Order Marker on [NAME]" clause, so those powers wouldn't work here anyways.

All together we have:

FIRST MATE
At the start of the game, choose a small or medium Unique Hero you control to be Nikerym O'Hara's First Mate. After revealing Order Marker 1 on this Army Card, before taking Nikerym's turn, you may take a turn with Nikerym's First Mate. Any Special Power on the First Mate's Army Card that would take a turn with a different Army Card cannot be used this turn.

Hope that helps!

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

Vydar_XLIII, of course that helps! Thanks!

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

I submitted a custom for the QC3 Summertime Contest and did not win, primarily because of certain ambiguities in the wording of Circle Singing Death Song. Maybe you could help . . . ?

"I worry about interpretation on Hjordis' Circle Singing Death Song. I love the idea, but when an opponent's figure begins singing, does that figure's controller choose one of their opponents' figures? And if so, can that figure choose Hjordis if Hjordis hasn't finished her song and been removed yet?

And if she is destroyed by some other means than inflicted wounds, does the effect not trigger?" ~ cmgames

As it appears on Card:

Circle Singing Death Song
When Hjordis Muirgen would receive enough wounds to be destroyed, she first moves 4 spaces and then begins to sing her Circle Singing Death Song. For each opponent's figure within 4 spaces of her roll an attack die. If you roll a skull, that figure receives a wound. If you roll a blank, that figure begins to sing Hjordis Muirgen's Circle Singing Death Song, continuing the process until no more blanks are rolled. Then destroy Hjordis Muirgen. Figures do not need clear line of sight for Circle Singing Death Song.

A tentative fix:

Circle Singing Death Song
When Hjordis Muirgen would receive enough wounds to be destroyed, she first moves 4 spaces and then begins to sing her Circle Singing Death Song. For each opponent's figure within 4 spaces of her roll an attack die. If you roll a skull, that figure receives a wound. If you roll a blank, that figure begins to sing Circle Singing Death Song, but affecting only opponents of Hjordis Muirgen, continuing the process until no more blanks are rolled. Then destroy Hjordis Muirgen. Figures do not need clear line of sight for Circle Singing Death Song.

 

[Vydar_XLIII]

Lets see what we can do!

Firstly I want to figure out exactly what you want to happen, because I agree with the criticism. it isn't incredibly clear. This is what I think is meant to happen:

1) Hjordis would die.
2) Hjordis gets to move 4 spaces. (This move can not provoke LEAs, because, well she's dead already, so more wounds don't matter. But this needs to be spelled out.)
3) Hjordis begins singing.
4) Opponents figures within 4 of Hjordis are affected by the song and either take wounds (skull), also begin singing (blank/symbol), or nothing happens (shield).
5) for each figure that a blank/symbol is rolled, they begin singing and the process repeats again.

This next part is unclear. We don't know what exactly that entails. Who is affected by the new song of the figure that rolled a blank/symbol)? Is it within 4 of that figure, or within 4 of Hjordis? I think you want it to be the new figure, but the wording doesn't say that.

Assuming my assumptions are correct, Here is what I have come up with.

CIRCLE SINGING DEATH SONG
When Hjordis Muirgen would be destroyed, do not remove her from the battlefield. You may immediately move Hjordis up to 4 spaces, and she never takes any leaving engagement attacks during this move. Hjordis then sings the Circle Singing Death Song. When a figure sings the Circle Singing Death Song, roll 1 Combat Die for each opponent's figure within 4 spaces of the singing figure. If you roll a skull, that figure receives a wound. If you roll a blank or a Valkyrie symbol, that figure sings the Circle Singing Death Song once all dice for the current singing figure have been rolled. When all dice for every figure singing the Circle Singing Death Song have been rolled, remove Hjordis Muirgen from the battlefield.

That's how I would word the power you currently have; however, I would like to make a few suggestions on how to improve the power as a whole.

First, change the name of the power. Circle Singing Death Song is very wordy. Too many modifiers. I'd suggest Spreading Death Song or Spreading Song of Death. "Spreading" describes the song better than "Circle Singing" in my opinion. Second, remove the 4 space movement at the beginning of the power. It seems like a band-aid for poor play. You should strive to position her well before she dies and your opponent should try to kill her in a bad position. Removing the free 4 space move makes her a much more interesting figure to play. Third, add a clause at the end that says " a figure may only be affected by the song once per turn" otherwise this could spiral out of control.

Taking all my suggestions into account the power looks like this.

SPREADING DEATH SONG
When Hjordis Muirgen would be destroyed, do not remove her from the battlefield. Hjordis then sings the Spreading Death Song. When a figure sings the Spreading Death Song, roll 1 Combat Die for each opponent's figure within 4 spaces of the singing figure. If you roll a skull, that figure receives a wound. If you roll a blank or a Valkyrie symbol, that figure sings the Spreading Death Song once all dice for the current singing figure have been rolled. A figure can only be affected by Spreading Death Song once per turn. When all dice for every figure singing the Spreading Death Song have been rolled, remove Hjordis Muirgen from the battlefield.

This was a fun problem to solve. Hope I helped!

 

[Myriadite]

Wow, that was impressive.

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Vydar_XLIII again.

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

Wow, that was impressive.

I absolutely agree! As usual, Vydar_XLIII hit it on the nose and out of the park. The only change that might occur would be in the name, in case I decide to use a different figure and go for some sort of space siren, as SoV prefers aliens to fantasy figures, so I've heard . . .

 

[Vydar_XLIII]

Thank you @Myriadite and @kolakoski !

I also just noticed one more thing. What happens if there are 2 blank/symbols rolled per song? We need to explicitly say that you get to choose the order. So I added the new text in bold.

SPREADING DEATH SONG
When Hjordis Muirgen would be destroyed, do not remove her from the battlefield. Hjordis then sings the Spreading Death Song. When a figure sings the Spreading Death Song, roll 1 Combat Die for each opponent's figure within 4 spaces on the singing figure. If you roll a skull, that figure receives a wound. If you roll a blank or a Valkyrie symbol, that figure sings the Spreading Death Song once all dice for the current singing figure have been rolled. If you roll a blank or a Valkyrie symbol for multiple figures in one song, you may choose the order in which the figures sing. A figure can only be affected by Spreading Death Song once per turn. When all dice for every figure singing the Spreading Death Song have been rolled, remove Hjordis Muirgen from the battlefield.

 

[Dad_Scaper]

That looks good. Thanks for pitching in, fellas.

 

[kolakoski]

Well met!

For the same figure:

Singing Sword
Range 1, Attack 4
When Hjordis Muirgen attacks with Singing Sword and inflicts a wound, roll a 20-sided die for additional wounding. If you roll a 1-9, the defending figure receives no additional wounds from Singing Sword. If you roll of 10-19, add an additional wound to the defending figure's Army Card and roll again for Singing Sword additional wounding. On a roll of 20, destroy the defending figure.

Patterned after Sujoah's Poison Sting Special Attack, but not quite right.

Aria of Despair
After moving and attacking, you may roll a 20-sided die for each opponent's figure within 4 spaces of Hjordis Muirgen. On a roll of 11-20, that figure must be moved its full movement allowance by its owner by the shortest route back towards its Start Zone.

Admittedly awkward. I think some other unit has proper wording, . . .