Bums

[ElvenEnvy]

Originally Posted by happyjosiah

He said "nevermind" and abruptly turned and walked away. It really bothered me at the time, and it still kinda does. I had no cash to give him, and normally I'd think "well, clearly he wanted it for drugs or booze or something", but this was a guy who was rooting through trash cans and probably was actually hungry. I have no idea why he would refuse my offer, but I imagine it's the same reason he was homeless in the first place, refusing to go to a shelter or whatever it might be. I'm really not sure how to help someone like that, though my heart breaks for them.

Alot of them don't like to go into the stores and restaraunts. People usually give them a hard time or the staff will kick them out. A couple friends of mine once took a bum into a restaurant (like a TGI Fridays or Applebees I think) for the guy to tell his life story over supper. They had to be really insistant with the staff that the bum was with them and wouldn't be a problem. They were seated in a corner out of view of the rest of the dining room. Then where shooed to go to the bar to "free up tablespace" after they were done eating (pretty much code for please leave). It's embarrassing for them and for the person who's giving to them too.

[cavebehr]

I have spent time with someone who was homeless. He told me stories of shelters that were not safe, yes you can go there and get food, yes some of them help you with second hand clothes and even a place to crap and clean up a bit. The problem is they are not in any way policed, so you might get mugged by another homeless person for your shoes or whatever little you have. When you are least expecting it one of them may have a mental breakdown and harm you and others before they can either be subdued or ran out.

Conversely, the city I lived in formely has had to change its bus routes and limit its stops because there were too many bums and not enough police. The bums were asking for everything and anything from anyone who was using the stop. It cut into the number of people who were riding the bus for work.

I learned a long time ago to wear an older worn coat, shoes and other outer items to look like I had nothing. It helped keep anyone from asking you for things.


The funniest thing I ever saw, once while in the bahamas for a vacation the bum problem was so bad, they were selling t-shirts that said in large letters and a number.

DO NOT ASK ME 4 S@#%!!!!

[kolakoski]

Originally Posted by cavebehr

The funniest thing I ever saw, once while in the bahamas for a vacation the bum problem was so bad, they were selling t-shirts that said in large letters and a number.

DO NOT ASK ME 4 S@#%!!!!

Well met!

I have been vacationing in Negril, Jamaica, for a number of years now. There is, and has been, even before our current economic crisis, a lack of employment opportunities for the local populace. The money taken in by the hotels does not "trickle down." Begging and other means of extracting money (nonviolently, such as selling useless junk) are reflexive reactions by large swathes of the population. If things continue as they have, I would not be surprised to see it happen here, if it hasn't already in some places.

[samuelfrost4]

I always try to have a knife on hand and know how to use it. People don't ask me for money cause I`m a kid but we dont live in a "nice" place so I carry around a knife or 2 and know how to use and throw them. I`m not really experienced about the getting mugged, its never happened to me but its happened to people I know so I recommend knowing how to use a small weapon and carry it around. Or you could take a totally diffident approach and not necessarily know how to use them but carry like 2' long knives on your belt for intimidation purposes. When my parents get asked for money for some reason they wont give out money but they will give them what they want. (EG gas, food, a drive sometimes. But not beer/wine/drugs of course.) I think there should be a answer on the poll for that. So yeah... Thats all I have to say.

[cavebehr]

Well met sam. Sometimes people do only need an item, gas, food, clothing. If someone asks and you have the means to help with that immediate need then good. People have to help each other, the greatest or most difficult part is to figure out who is the real needy person and who is the lying bum. It seems your parents have a good sense about them, learn from them how to tell the difference, and you will almost never need those knives.

[samuelfrost4]

Haha I know I wont need to use them very often. But its better safe than sorry, and I enjoy handling and throwing them. The main reason I started learning to throw knives is for fun. (My favorite pastimes are Heroscape and throwing knives. . It is really hard and %80 percent of the time if you offer to buy them what they asked for, they will refuse. One time my friend had someone ask him for money to buy beer. He almost gave it to him for being honest. (this friend is like 30) Also someone need to make it so the word Heroscape is a word on this website. Nice to meet you to. Thanks!

[jbbnbsmith]

Having read through four pages of posts, I just wanted to add this to my earlier comment.

I live in Bel Air, MD which is a bedroom community of mostly whte collar workers who commute to Baltimore, DC, or work at the Army proving ground as a contractor. The surrounding county was mostly agricuture, but that is changing quickly as shopping centers, restaurants, and super Wal-Mart continue to spring up everywhere. Bel Air has been known as an upper-middle class town make up mostly of two income families with kids. Sure , there has always been a small percentage of people who were homeless and in need of emergency assistance, but the local food pantry and single homeless shelter in town was always sufficient.

Until a few years ago. Local agencies literally turn away hundreds of families in need each year (400 to 600 in 2009 and 2010, and we have passed that number already in 2011). As I mentioned earlier, our church phone rings every day with someone asking for assistance. There are several tent communities hidden away in woods behind the Best Buy and other shopping centers. Yet most people in Bel Air are shocked to learn that we have homeless people in our midst.

The fact is, things are bad and are only getting worse. I only say this because I believe that many people's understanding of the homeless is going to be changing significantly over the next couple of years. We have helped people who were succesful computer programmers, engineers, and salesmen, who suddenly found themselves unemployed, quickly ran out of savings, and found their homes forclosed on and living in their cars with a family of five.

I find that I am not so quick to judge as perhaps I once was.

[Frylock]

Living in Chicago and now going to school in Boston, I see a lot of homeless. I never give them money, because you really can't control what they do with it. However, I'll give them my leftovers from a restaurant. I know it seems demeaning, but giving bums food (even leftovers) is one of the best ways to help them. If you don't like the idea of giving them your scraps, just buy one extra cheeseburger or something inexpensive. That way you can feel confidant that you are really helping these people.

[rym]

Originally Posted by Frylock

However, I'll give them my leftovers from a restaurant. I know it seems demeaning, but giving bums food (even leftovers) is one of the best ways to help them. If you don't like the idea of giving them your scraps, just buy one extra cheeseburger or something inexpensive. That way you can feel confidant that you are really helping these people.

Now this is something I've done many times on date night with my wife. We will go have dinner and catch a movie in downtown and usually, we're walking around with leftovers as we head to our next destination (the movies, or most likely, the local bookstore before the movie starts). Many times I've happily given the food to someone asking for a handout, and, whether it's right or wrong, I feel a little better for doing a small, yet significant thing for another human being.