Heroscapers
Go Back   Heroscapers > HeroScapers Community > Events
Events Post your HS event or find an event near you


Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
  #1  
Old September 25th, 2006, 12:58 AM
funrun's Avatar
funrun funrun is offline
Site Admin
 
Join Date: May 9, 2006
Location: TX - Dallas
Posts: 2,241
Images: 7
Blog Entries: 11
funrun is surprisingly tart
Safety In Meeting Online Friends In Real Life?

Because of the recent incident about Ultradoug—myself, ninthdoc, truth, and others—hope no one has been scared away from meeting other 'scapers in the future. Just as we Americans have responded to terrorist attacks not by becoming recluses in our homes, but by being smarter about the world around us, so I hope we Heroscapers also become smarter about talking to others online and meeting them in person.

After 9 months of secrets, I would now like to tell all that the incident that ninthdoc refered to for the first time publicly today in his safety post here
Quote:
Originally Posted by ninthdoc
The first time was on heroscapehq.com. Using only methods that were available to anyone who knew where to look online, I discovered that one of our members, who had been attending events at which children were present, was to attend a court session as a defendant in a case in which he had been accused of sexual assault of a child.
actually was brought to ninthdoc's attention because I suspected something was wrong with someone here and asked ninthdoc for help (as I recommend anyone should do.) My very first intuition of this person was that they were a sexual creep, but everyone here gets to know each other and pretty soon it feels like a big family, then months later I found out I was initially more right than I cared to know.

I will also add that Ultradoug had given me a few orange warning flags over my months of knowing him, and for this reason amongst many others, I purposely avoided giving UD my name, a photo of my face, my IM name, or any email address of mine (even the junk one). Now I find out that these little hints were once again more correct than I cared to know. (Given this alarming track record I seem to have going, I will add that no one else here has made me feel the way I did about these two.)

Now comes the interesting part I want all to note—this first incident happened 9 months ago, before I had ever met any Heroscapers in person or given any of them any personal info about me. One would think that as a young female online, one who was initially so cautious of what she thought was a stereotypical creepy internet gamer group that she didn't even have an avatar for her first month as a member (), would slink into a hole and not want to talk to anyone here again, much less meet anyone in person.

No, instead I felt empowered by what had happened. I was glad to know I should trust my instincts, but I also took more precautions in the future, especially considering every scaper I have met I was always going by myself to meet the group. Since this first incident snafu, I have met more scapers in real life than perhaps anyone here, and most certainly I have met more across the US than anyone else. By this I mean not just people from across the country, but I mean I literally met them in their own states. Every scaper I have met (I got lucky and barely missed meeting UD) has made sure that I had fun and felt safe in doing so. I would like to commend these groups for that by mentioning them here: Denver, Dallas, and Ohio.

My point to all of this is that I have had tons of fun in all my travels with all of the 'scapers I have met. I just encourage everyone to be more careful about their privacy. Just because you are male does not mean you are safe, and I am not just talking about sexual predators, but you never know who is wanting to steal something from you or even take your identity, whether it is your online persona or your wallet as you sit at the gaming table. I look forward to meeting many more of you in the future.

Sincerely,
funrun

(hehe, did you think after all of that I would actually give out my real name?)

funrun's HS Repaints
Read my blog for interesting randomness as it comes to me.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old September 25th, 2006, 01:28 AM
ninthdoc's Avatar
ninthdoc ninthdoc is offline
ATF Agent
 
Join Date: May 8, 2006
Location: TX - Dallas (Corinth)
Posts: 4,844
Blog Entries: 5
ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby! ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby! ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby! ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby! ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby!
funrun, I'm glad that you can illustrate that being more cautious does not mean that we should close ourselves off completely. This is exactly what I'm driving at. Use good judgement, but enjoy life.

When you begin denying yourself your own life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness, that's when the bad guys win.

I've always been crazy, but it's kept me from going insane.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old September 25th, 2006, 07:26 AM
Oprime's Avatar
Oprime Oprime is offline
 
Join Date: May 10, 2006
Location: MA - south shore
Posts: 697
Oprime is surprisingly tart
Thanks Fun for posting this, as this is precicely something that I was thinking about.

Although I have not posted on the other thread, I have read it completely.

After meeting some new people at our recent tournament, I was excited to branch out and meet some new people, perhaps invite them to my home, then after reading Sky's post it gave me pause to the point were I almost decided not to.

I met Pilgrim through Scapers and frappers and look what we accomplished.

I have been in contact via telephone and pm of another member since the tourny and we plan on hanging out for a casual day of scaping.

I decided you can't live in fear of what might happen...but you definatly need to be aware of what can happen.

Thanks for the post.

-Prime

Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old September 25th, 2006, 08:39 AM
toddrew's Avatar
toddrew toddrew is offline
 
Join Date: May 10, 2006
Location: CO - Loveland
Posts: 2,160
toddrew has disabled reputation
I haven't posted on any of the threads related to the recent incident (mostly because the majority of what's been said I agree with, and do laud how it has been handled publicly and presumably privately), but I'm glad to see this thread surface!

We need to be cautious and educated and act according to our comfort with the risk. I've met several people in the area due to this site at public places and become at least good acquaintances with all of them, and becoming good friends with a few of them (due to time and probability constraints, not my "excessive deviancy" intiution - otherwise, I'd be good friends with everyone I've met in this way...)

Anyway, just chiming in to echo funrun's piece about keeping up one's guard, but enjoy the community here.

And you can see her
Before it cracks and goes out
She throws rocks at streetlights
Keeps the streetlight changer busy



Floundering Customs Thread
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old September 25th, 2006, 09:44 AM
Velenne's Avatar
Velenne Velenne is offline
 
Join Date: May 10, 2006
Location: USA - TX - DFW
Posts: 2,734
Images: 42
Blog Entries: 13
Velenne wears ripped pants of awesomeness Velenne wears ripped pants of awesomeness Velenne wears ripped pants of awesomeness Velenne wears ripped pants of awesomeness Velenne wears ripped pants of awesomeness Velenne wears ripped pants of awesomeness
Whoa. This is all news to me. I can kind of infer what happened, but what's the story?
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old September 25th, 2006, 09:48 AM
toddrew's Avatar
toddrew toddrew is offline
 
Join Date: May 10, 2006
Location: CO - Loveland
Posts: 2,160
toddrew has disabled reputation
Quote:
Originally Posted by Velenne
Whoa. This is all news to me. I can kind of infer what happened, but what's the story?
Click here for the related background story.

And you can see her
Before it cracks and goes out
She throws rocks at streetlights
Keeps the streetlight changer busy



Floundering Customs Thread
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old September 25th, 2006, 10:34 AM
funrun's Avatar
funrun funrun is offline
Site Admin
 
Join Date: May 9, 2006
Location: TX - Dallas
Posts: 2,241
Images: 7
Blog Entries: 11
funrun is surprisingly tart
I would also like to add that everyone should question in your mind the probability of every little thing that any one tells you, especially someone you have only known online.

As a great example of the above, (ninthdoc isn't even aware of what I am about to say. . .) I have been talking to ninthdoc online for an entire year now, and for many months I kept open the possibility that he may not be the cop that he says he is. Not because I had any reason to doubt him, but because at that time I simply had no way of knowing for sure. Over several months I have talked to other people who have met him in person and believed him, so when it came time for me to turn to someone for help, I had to believe that ninthdoc was indeed someone safe I could trust. Even still there was a minute possibility that he could be faking his cop identity to every scaper he had ever met, but finally, at GenCon, I saw with my own eyes his old worn wallet with the badge in it (not because I asked to see it though, so why did he show it to me? hmmmmmmm. . . j/k!) So now with all things considered, I am 99.99999% sure ninthdoc is the cop he says he is. But still, the badge could have been a fake .

funrun's HS Repaints
Read my blog for interesting randomness as it comes to me.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old September 25th, 2006, 11:57 AM
InfinityMax's Avatar
InfinityMax InfinityMax is offline
Man Genius
 
Join Date: May 4, 2006
Location: TX - Arlington
Posts: 3,991
Images: 5
Blog Entries: 1
InfinityMax wears ripped pants of awesomeness InfinityMax wears ripped pants of awesomeness InfinityMax wears ripped pants of awesomeness InfinityMax wears ripped pants of awesomeness InfinityMax wears ripped pants of awesomeness InfinityMax wears ripped pants of awesomeness InfinityMax wears ripped pants of awesomeness
Yeah, I hear you. I have had two gaming parties at my house, and have decided that from now on, if I decide to have another, I'll personally invite people I've already met. Meeting new people should happen in public places. You know, where they can't find your house.

But you should still meet new people!
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old September 25th, 2006, 12:03 PM
ninthdoc's Avatar
ninthdoc ninthdoc is offline
ATF Agent
 
Join Date: May 8, 2006
Location: TX - Dallas (Corinth)
Posts: 4,844
Blog Entries: 5
ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby! ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby! ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby! ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby! ninthdoc rolls all skulls baby!
Quote:
Originally Posted by funrun
(not because I asked to see it though, so why did he show it to me? hmmmmmmm. . . j/k!)
I believe I can answer this question. You have shared with me things that you've produced at work, both intentionally and by accident or game ( ). These are things that you are obviously very proud of. My life has changed a lot in the past 10 years, but I still remember just how proud I was of that badge when I earned it. I worked and waited for 5 years to get it. So I wanted to share w/you something that was important in my life. Plus, I figure at some point someone was going to ask me to pony up and prove who I am, so I saved you the uncomfortableness of actually saying, "Are you really a cop, or do you just say that for the internet?"

I'm actually very glad that you brought this up. Someone once said that it would be nice if other officers would reveal themselves online. The reason that I don't think this would make a difference is b/c you never really know. It is this very wariness that I'm advocating. So you go on being 99.99999% sure. I wouldn't have it any other way.

I've always been crazy, but it's kept me from going insane.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old September 25th, 2006, 12:08 PM
wisinger's Avatar
wisinger wisinger is offline
Nipple Rings
 
Join Date: May 26, 2006
Location: TX - Dallas (McKinney)
Posts: 579
wisinger Woo who?
Wonderful post Fun. Glad to know that the creepies don't win. and glad to hear, what it sounds like to me, that our community is closer then ever, and that gives a sense of well being to me. But I can't loose sight of the possibilities of bad people.

I like IMax, prefer to have private get togeathers, as opposed to open an open door policy to my home, as I don't want people I don't know coming anywhere near where I sleep at night, and where my wife and kids feel safe.

Thank you again for all of the effort and energy that goes into making this an open, diverse, and safe place to be, as much as it can be.

Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old September 25th, 2006, 12:12 PM
netherspirit's Avatar
netherspirit netherspirit is offline
Site Admin
 
Join Date: May 8, 2006
Location: OH - Cleveland
Posts: 8,771
Blog Entries: 5
netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer netherspirit is a wielder of the Ban Hammer
When Joah came down to stay with us the night before GenCon, I never worried about it for a second, but after talking to my mom about when she said "You are letting someone you have never met come stay with you? What if he kills you?" I made some joke and didn't think about it too much. But as the time came closer and closer I couldn't stop thinking about it. "What if he does kill us?" Ugh, what a thought.

Obviously he didn't kill us. He came down and everything was fine. We played some Scape, had a good time. There are only a few members that I would let come over, let alone stay in my house while I sleep...and now it might be even fewer members that I would let come to my house...
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old September 25th, 2006, 12:17 PM
markwars's Avatar
markwars markwars is offline
Mintiest of the Minty
 
Join Date: May 10, 2006
Location: TX - Dallas (Denton)
Posts: 8,925
Images: 9
Blog Entries: 14
markwars wears ripped pants of awesomeness markwars wears ripped pants of awesomeness markwars wears ripped pants of awesomeness markwars wears ripped pants of awesomeness markwars wears ripped pants of awesomeness markwars wears ripped pants of awesomeness
I keep trying to reply to this thread and I keep deleting my repsonses before I submit them. I am a knot of emotions right now.

All I can say for sure is that this sucks. It really really sucks.

Reply With Quote
Reply

Go Back   Heroscapers > HeroScapers Community > Events
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:21 AM.

Heroscape background footer

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
User Alert System provided by Advanced User Tagging (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2019 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.