Indiana Jones and the Wizards of the Coast

[bumper15]

Oh god! Prepare for some serious sarcasm everyone

I agree with NightSwipe

[tcglkn]

Loving this

[The Deadliest Warrior]

CHAPTER 6

“No, I’m actually GrungeBob,” came the expected sarcastic reply. Onacara smirked, but quickly glanced over his shoulder at the tent flap nervously and whispered, “I’m not Onacara here, though. Peter Adkison has already caught two other Heroscapers spies, I Hate Atlaga and The Deadliest Warrior, and turned them over to the Bot. To put it simply, no one’s hating Atlaga anymore and there’s one less warrior in town.”

Aldin winced. “A Bot?”

Onacara grimaced back. “No, a monkey. Let’s go before things get ugly.”

Indy dusted his fedora, put it on his head and said, “Who’s Adkison?”

“Peter Adkison is the owner and leader of this grim operation,” Onacara said, surprisingly with no sarcasm in his tone of voice. “They’re very close to getting Aquilla’s Flagbearer. We need to act fast or—”

The tent flap opened and a man with dirty gray peach fuzz and balding hair walked in. Onacara stood rigidly at attention. “Mr. Adkison,” Onacara dutifully reported.

Adkison ignored Onacara and looked at Aldin. He sneered and rubbed his grimy chin. “What happened to you, beautiful?” he said.

Aldin looked down at his tattered leg and began to speak, but Adkison cut him off and looked over at Indy, who was brushing the dirt off of his messy outfit. “Who’re you.” It wasn’t a question; it was an order to answer him.

Onacara replied, “Suspected of pro-Heroscaper activity. We captured him. He can be turned over later.”

“Why later? Why not now? The Bot is hungry.” Adkison chuckled to himself as he thought about the mysterious ‘Bot’. “Come, let’s do it now. We’ve got several other Heroscapers who we can turn over.” He started to walk to the tent flap and turned. “Well?” he said, a bit irritably. “Get a move on!”

Onacara gave an apologetic look to Indy and shoved him forward with considerable force. “Move!” he growled menacingly, but whispered, “I’ll get you out of this somehow, Jones.” Aldin followed behind, limping. Adkison suggested taking him to the hospital tent but Aldin weakly shook his head and shuffled miserably forward.

The camp was busy with activity. There was an entire tent dedicated to anti-Heroscape activity, as well as other tents for Dungeons and Dragons work and, of course, the excavation for the Sixth Flagbearer. As they passed a large, open area with a large metal pot, boiling with a molten substance, Adkison sneered at Indy and said, “See what we do to your precious Heroscape?” An assembly line of Wizards grunts hauled packs of Heroscape: unopened, or used; rare or common; and dumped the cargo into the boiling, hissing, steaming pot, which sizzled the plastic up like cats drinking milk. A foul, pungent odor filled the air as the hateful activities continued.

They approached a large tent, probably the largest in the camp. A droning mumble came from within. Adkison said, “But this – this is where we take care of ‘Scaper scum like you, Dr. Jones. The Bot.”

He swung open the tent flap dramatically and there was an enormous block of text, hyperlinked to who-knows-where and in a ten-foot-tall humanoid shape. The mumbling was decipherable now: “Scooby-Doo Games… SpongeBob Games… Avatar Games… Laser Hair Removal… Real Estate…” Hyperlinked drool dripped from its mouth.

Indy gaped, for once at a loss for any plan of action. And Adksion steered him by the shoulders closer to his imminent doom, when suddenly a cry rang out:

"Hey! No! Put me down!"

Indy couldn't turn to look, but he knew it was over for everyone when Aldin shouted: "No! Leave Truth alone!"

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So now we know where those Bots come from...

And now comes into the picture! What will happen? How can the horrific systematic destruction of Heroscape be stopped, and the preservation of Aquilla's Flagbearer, stuff of legend, be carried out? Find out next Chapter!

[bumper15]

I can't believe you turned yourself in.

The Bot is the the ultimate in Scaper torture.

Keep it up.

[NightSwipe]

A very interesting turn of events.

[Fen_Hydra]

Very interesting story!

[I Hate Atlaga]

LOL. I'm dead, but I died for the cause.

[The Deadliest Warrior]

CHAPTER 7

Adkison had been steering Indy closer and closer to the enormous Bot, restrained only be enormous shackles pegged to the ground, but upon hearing Aldin’s outburst he turned, grinning wickedly.

“You’re no Wizard, are you?” he whispered. He licked his lips eagerly and looked at Onacara. “You,” he said. “Send him over to the Bot too.” He swiveled his head yet again at the man Aldin called “Truth.” He was well-built and had neat black hair with a small beard under his chin. He was quite young, only in his early thirties at the most, and he looked at the growing situation with clear anxiety.

Adkison walked over to Truth. Behind him, the Bot roared, angry and hungry, waiting to be fed on its next meal of Heroscapers. “Mexican Restaurant… Internet Games… Real Estate…” the Bot groaned on and on, hyperlinked spam flying from its mouth to who-knows-where, most likely Heroscapers.com. “So you’re Truth,” Adkison said, ignoring the ranting beast behind him. “Ha! Finally, a meal the Bot will enjoy!” He turned and began to give an order to Onacara when the spy leaned forward and sucker-punched the owner of Wizards of the Coast in the face.

Adkison staggered back and Onacara pulled out a pistol, aiming it at him as he struggled to get to his feet. “Heroscapers left, Heroscapers right!” the madman Adkison chuckled, gleeful at the turn of events. “You think you have me but you don’t!” He stooped and tripped over to the shackles holding the Bot. Truth’s captors let him go and ran out of the tent. Indy and Aldin backed up slowly, gaping. Onacara snidely commented, “I hardly think that a block of text will do anything to us.”

Insane cries echoed the tent as the Heroscapers pulled out hidden weapons from coats and pant legs – Indy with his whip, Aldin and what little was left of his submachine gun, Onacara and his pistol, and Truth and a machete he had somehow smuggled in with him. Adkison dramatically raised the shackles high in the air and cracked them. He fell as the Bot thundered at the Heroscapers.

Aldin fell and cried out as his leg was twisted back. He fired his submachine gun haphazardly into the air and hit the Bot, but the bullets flew straight through the beast, doing nothing. The magazine emptied and Aldin threw the weapon itself, which fell short. Onacara ducked back to cover him, placing his shots carefully.

Indy cracked his whip, trying to keep the gargantuan monster at bay, and it turned around, confused by the snapping noise. Instead he swiped a mighty arm at Truth, who spun in a circle and fell hard in the dirt. As he tried to push himself up, the Bot grabbed him, dangling him by a foot in the air over its mouth.

Indy looked at Adkison, shrieking gleefully, and over at Onacara, aiming at the psychopath. “No!” Indy shouted. Onacara looked quickly and Indy pointed at Truth. Onacara shot into the Bot’s fingers and, while no damage was done to the monster, it dropped Truth and bellowed loudly, running at Onacara and Aldin. Truth flopped to the ground like a ragdoll and hit his head on a rock.

Indy grabbed the unconscious Truth’s machete and rushed at the Bot, swinging wildly. The blade passed right through the Bot’s leg, text spilling onto the ground, but more and more regenerating as the few seconds between the hacks and slashes of the machete passed. Onacara gave Aldin the pistol and started dragging him back, Aldin firing at the monster’s face ineffectively. Indy looked over at Truth and realized only he could save them. “Onacara! Aldin!” Indy shouted. “Buy me some time!” The pair nodded and Indy dashed over to Truth, who was stirring feebly on the ground. He could hear the Bot rampaging through the large tent and Adkison still laughing hysterically.

“Truth!” Indy hissed. “Wake up!” He slapped Truth gently and suddenly Truth sat up, fully alert.

“Who are you?” Truth groggily asked.

“Not now!” Indy said frantically, looking over his shoulder. Onacara and Aldin were still keeping up the game of cat and mouse, but sooner or later the Bot would nab them if Indy didn’t hurry. “You’re and Admin at Heroscapers, right?”

“Yes, but –”

Indy stopped Truth by putting his hand over his mouth, pointed at the Bot, and said, “Ban Hammer time.” Truth nodded. He stood up, reached into his back pocket and pulled out a small metal hammer with the Crest of the Valkyrie emblazoned on it. “For Heroscape!” Truth yelled. The Bot turned yet again. Truth ran at the monster, raised the tiny weapon, and brought it down on the beast’s ankle.

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Oh no! Cliffhanger! Feedback is always appreciated! What will happen? And can Aquilla's Flagbearer be found, and if so, saved from the evil clutches of the Wizards of the Coast?

[Corzan]

This is awesome. Especially the Truth/Ban Hammer thing. And the references to the spambots on heroscapers. And the references to Scape. And Indiana Jones.

It's all AWESOME!

[The Deadliest Warrior]

Thanks guys! Appreciate the positive feedback! I'll have the next Chapter up soon!

[tcglkn]

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to The Deadliest Warrior again.

I tried.

[The Deadliest Warrior]

CHAPTER 8

The Bot screamed immediately after the Ban Hammer touched it. The text started to flop and ooze its way off of the beast and it clawed the air and moaned and whined in its misery before it shrank to a tiny line gray of words that cheeped once and then was no more.

Truth sighed and hefted the Ban Hammer in his hand. Aldin shakily got up to his feet and pocketed the pistol. Onacara whistled. “What does it say?” Indy asked.

Truth walked over to the tiny line of text. “clelabeckerl – HAS BEEN BANNED”

Onacara laughed aloud when Indy stopped him. “This isn’t over. We’ve been exposed now. We’d do best to go – now.” Onacara nodded and supported Aldin over his shoulder. As they limped out Indy walked up to Truth and said, “I’m Indiana Jones. Sorry for the less-than-formal introduction but we have to do things on the move a lot.” Truth nodded and they shook hands. Indy continued, “So are there any other ‘Scaper spies here?” Truth shook his head. Pointing to Aldin, Onacara, and himself, he said, “Just us – unless you’re one too…”

Indy said, “I play.”

The Wizards guards and grunts let the group pass, not knowing the situation immediately. Indy said in a hushed voice, “We’d do best to take advantage of this calm –” but just as suddenly they heard Adkison shout, “Those men over there! Get them!”

Gunshots peppered the air and the group dove to the floor and took cover behind a wooden crate. Onacara leaned over with Aldin’s pistol and fired. One of the Wizards grunts fell on one knee and crumpled down. He ducked just in time, as another volley of bullets flew over where his head was but five seconds earlier. “Aim better next time!” came the snide remark from behind the crate.

Indy began to motion for Truth and Aldin to start crawling away while Onacara frantically reloaded his pistol. Once Aldin and Truth had safely climbed over the other side of the tall fence behind the tent, Indy tried to pull Onacara away from the gunfight emerging; Onacara fired several more times before retreating. At least four Wizards guards lay sprawled on the floor.

Adkison’s voice shouted, “They’re getting away!” and yet more bullets flew at the retreating men, but they managed to turn the corner just in time. By the time the Wizards troop shad scrambled their way around the tent, Indy and his friends were long gone.

Behind a small hill right next to the fence, Indy tried to keep everyone quiet. “We need to stay on their trail in case they find Aquilla’s Flagbearer,” he said. “But we can’t let them find us again.”

They heard the Wizards soldiers tramping away and Aldin peeked over the edge of the little hill to see if they were gone. Once he had double-checked, he said, “We don’t need to follow them, Indy. I need to get help for my leg, and anyway I managed to get this.”

He pulled out a bunch of maps and documents. “I got these from Adkison,” he said. Truth grinned, starry-eyed at Aldin’s theft. “Positive rep, man!” he said. “Alright, let’s get help for his leg.”

“Fine,” Indy grumbled. “But then, we get back on the road.”

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A narrow escape! A thrilling find! An now, we wait in anticipation for the next installment! Feedback is always appreciated!