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  #1045  
Old July 7th, 2019, 10:22 PM
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Re: The Joke Thread
Joke of the Day

My neighbors listen to Smash Mouth’s All Star a lot.
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  #1046  
Old December 17th, 2019, 05:39 PM
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Re: The Joke Thread
What do you call Treebeard and his wife when they have a baby?

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Last edited by Taeblewalker; December 17th, 2019 at 07:44 PM.
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  #1047  
Old July 23rd, 2020, 09:01 PM
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Re: The Joke Thread
What's a quiet Hawaiian laugh?

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  #1048  
Old July 27th, 2020, 07:04 PM
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Re: The Joke Thread
For his birthday, an old man’s nephews secretly hire a call girl for him. When he answers the door she’s standing there in a slinky black dress. She says, “I’m here to give you super sex.”

After thinking for a minute the old man replies,

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  #1049  
Old July 29th, 2020, 07:48 PM
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Re: The Joke Thread
Why don't ants get sick?

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  #1050  
Old August 2nd, 2020, 02:02 AM
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What does a nosy pepper do?

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Last edited by Dysole; August 2nd, 2020 at 05:07 PM.
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  #1051  
Old September 3rd, 2020, 03:02 AM
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Re: The Joke Thread
One I like to rip out of nowhere without giving any time between set-up and punch line is:
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? Then immediately make choking sound.
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  #1052  
Old December 10th, 2020, 01:20 AM
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Re: The Joke Thread
How do you get four elephants in a Volkswagon?
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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator?
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How do you know there are two elephants in your refrigerator?
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How do you know there are three elephants in your refrigerator?
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How do you know there are four elephants in your refrigerator?
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  #1053  
Old March 30th, 2021, 12:59 PM
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Re: The Joke Thread
What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

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  #1054  
Old April 2nd, 2021, 02:13 PM
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Re: The Joke Thread
My friend got attacked by a group of mimes the other day. They did unspeakable things to him.

~TAF
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in THE ENEMY'S LAST RETREAT

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  #1055  
Old September 21st, 2021, 11:23 AM
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Re: The Joke Thread
A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a miniature grand piano and sets it on the bar rail. The bartender looks at him in confusion. Then, the patron reaches into his other pocket and pulls out a miniature human man, and sets him on the bar rail as well. The tiny man walks up to the piano, flicks his coattails back, sits down, and starts playing. The bartender is flabbergasted. He can't believe his eyes. "WHERE DID YOU GET HIM?!?" The bartender said. The patron reaches into his inner coat pocket and pulls out a gold artifact and says, "I recently obtained a Genie in a lamp. It will grant you any wish you desire. Would you like to give it a try?" Without hesitation, the bartender snatched the lamp from the patron and started rubbing it and pondering. "Hmmmm... How about a million bucks!"

*POOF*
A million ducks instantly appear in the bar. They're all quacking away, he can barely hear himself talk and yells, "WHAT THE HELL? I ASKED FOR A MILLION BUCKS!" The patron yells back, "YOU THINK I ASKED FOR A 10-INCH PIANIST?!"
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  #1056  
Old March 16th, 2022, 01:48 AM
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Re: The Joke Thread
What do you call a pencil that comes out of your butt?
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How does a mathematician say goodbye?
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