I remember an earlier mention of Valkyrie sealing their wellsprings in the story, but I guess I didn't know that the villain was especially well-read about them. If that was established at some point I must've missed it. The cruelty of his character was more well-established to me than the obsessiveness of it.
I also detected some of the seeds of where Utgar would eventually end up: becoming more distant from his daughter, committing more to war, having none of the hesitations about being a Valkyrie that Runa did... But while I recognize those seeds I still want to see them sprout. If you choose to continue this story then I certainly won't complain.
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So this was an improvement, but you gave it a 7 when you gave the original an 8? Say what?
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Accountability, argh! I must've been drunk. Or I was easier to please back then. Or maybe my ratings are ultimately meaningless as they're based on however I feel at the time. Usually right after I finish the story.
All I know is I definitely liked this one better. So I'll switch those scores. Or drop the first
Utgar to a 6. Whichever.
~TAF