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Should I break up with my Hot Girl Friend?

Posted June 16th, 2010 at 06:53 PM by Sylvano the Wasabus
What a thing to write about!
It sounds like a spam title, donít you think?

But hereís the case: my girlfriend is super nice. Sheís also very good looking. Sheís not a tall skinny broom of a woman, sheís more ... bounteous. Iím a pretty open-minded guy- Iíve tried not to make demands on her one way or the other. Iíve accepted her for whom and what she is and learned to appreciate it.

Now hereís the thing: Sheís always had a nice derriere, in my opinion. Not quite a Kardashian, but as I said before certainly not a broom stick. Nice, curvy, sweet.

Sadly Iím a busy guy, and I donít always get to spend as much time with her as Iíd like.

Anywho, I arrive home the other day and she is there waiting. And her butt is all different. Itís... smaller. Less tapered. I go into shock. Was it liposuction? Intense exercise program? Duct tape? Or just some really serious dictator panties?

I hadnít realized how ... accustomed I was to her rear end, and suddenly, itís all different. It just doesnít seem to be really her anymore.

She tried to calm me. Sheís on the short side, and she said it was to make the rest of her look bigger. I donít really get that- but whatever.

She said she wants to keep developing and growing as a person- but I like her just the way she... was.

Iím afraid she did it so sheíd appeal to more guys than just me.

I feel betrayed. I know sheís always been there for me, sheís always great, dependable, amazing really. Best girlfriend ever. But Iím having a hard time, or rather a soft time dealing with this newer slimmer butt....

Should I dump her?
(apologies to all, but I couldnít resist....)
Total Comments 35


Pickledpie's Avatar
That was probably the most awkward blog post I've read in a long time.
Posted June 16th, 2010 at 07:18 PM by Pickledpie Pickledpie is offline
clancampbell's Avatar
Nicest girlfriend ever, and your considering dumping her because she lost some of her "junk" from her "trunk"? Do what you feel is right, however I wouldn't break up with someone if my only issue with them was their backside.
Posted June 16th, 2010 at 07:33 PM by clancampbell clancampbell is offline
EternalThanos86's Avatar
Man, I gotta admit I love your blog entries, but this one has me puzzled. It's a bit odd of a question to be posing to a site half-filled with 18 & under's.

About the girl, after 3 years of marriage my best advice is TALK TO HER IN DEPTH AND TRY TO UNDERSTAND FULLY EVERYTHING THAT IS GOING ON. Then, make an educated decision. Seriously, miscommunication is the #1 problem of all marriages.
Posted June 16th, 2010 at 07:53 PM by EternalThanos86 EternalThanos86 is offline
MegaSilver's Avatar
Calm down, take a breather, and don't make any hasty moves. Follow ET's advice above.

Posted June 16th, 2010 at 08:49 PM by MegaSilver MegaSilver is offline
kolakoski's Avatar
Well met!

If she is so fine, why don't you want to marry her? And, if you don't, then the rest is irrelevant, let her go, and find someone else, as you have kids to consider. I'm to think that the size of a woman's derriere could conceivably matter that much! What do your kids think?
Posted June 16th, 2010 at 09:34 PM by kolakoski kolakoski is offline
Marry her and it will get bigger again... :roll:
Posted June 16th, 2010 at 10:17 PM by Onacara Onacara is offline
quozl's Avatar
Tell me I'm not the only one who gets the analogy!
Posted June 17th, 2010 at 01:23 AM by quozl quozl is online now
You're not quozl...but some of us were laughing at the others who didnt...now ya ruined it
Posted June 17th, 2010 at 02:21 AM by Onacara Onacara is offline
wriggz's Avatar
I say get more Girl Friends. Even if your existing one is alittle smaller, you can have all kinds. Some will be bigger, Some will be smaller, Some may not have a butt at all.

Sure some people might not except your girlfriend at a beauty pagent, but if you have fun with here that is all that matters.

Heck Some might argue that your girl friend is better than ever, and if she didn't shrink her butt she would have left you forever!

Plus in the near future you will be playing with your girlfriend and not even notice her butt. You will be having too much fun to realize the change. So horray to bottoms of all kinds, since when you are "playing" the bottoms don't matter much.

*I also bet your kids still love your girl friend and would be angry if you dumped her.
Posted June 17th, 2010 at 12:07 PM by wriggz wriggz is offline
tcglkn's Avatar
Great blog! lol
Posted June 17th, 2010 at 12:25 PM by tcglkn tcglkn is online now
MegaSilver's Avatar
Okay, so as Ona and quozl says this is an analogy? If it is then there is only one thing it can be... and I won't say.

Btw, I've just realized now that StW never mentioned trying to teach "her" how to play 'Scape and what not. Should have seen that as the sign that his "girlfriend" was only an analogy...

EDIT: I've finally get it now! Recent developments with other "fashionable" women made his "girlfriend" try to fit in the with the crowd, but in only made her end stand out.

Posted June 17th, 2010 at 12:41 PM by MegaSilver MegaSilver is offline
Cavalier's Avatar
Wow, I can't believe how many failed to see the point.
Posted June 17th, 2010 at 01:20 PM by Cavalier Cavalier is offline
Greyelephant's Avatar
So she decreased in the size of her BASE. At least she's still got a good FIGURE?

I hope this helps.
Posted June 17th, 2010 at 01:42 PM by Greyelephant Greyelephant is offline
ZBeeblebrox's Avatar
This is so funny. Not only is the blog brilliant, but the responses are priceless.
Posted June 17th, 2010 at 01:57 PM by ZBeeblebrox ZBeeblebrox is offline
Freezie's Avatar
One of the better blogs I've read in a while. I'm surprised it took some of you so long to get it. Thanks for starting my day with a laugh.
Posted June 17th, 2010 at 02:19 PM by Freezie Freezie is offline
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